An update on my relationship status with Endorphins

So I thought I would give you an update on my relationship with the endorphins… I feel the best way to express it is that if we were defining our status on Facebook, it would definitely be ‘it’s complicated’. Like a lot of relationships, there are ups and downs. I’m not going to lie, we do fight, and then we make up and I’m left all glowing (read sweaty and red faced), but the brain chemical haze wears off fairly quickly.

I’m also not all that fond of his mates – soft tissue injuries (ok minor strains and aches but let’s make it sound a bit more impressive) and early mornings. BUT, I know they’re not him so I will put up with them for the sake of the relationship.

It’s not all bad though, I mean we haven’t BROKEN UP or anything, and let’s be honest, where I’m concerned it was a relationship that wasn’t all that likely to last so that’s a real positive! I haven’t run that marathon (surprising, I know!), sometimes you say some crazy things in a loved up haze, BUT I’m not totally ruling it out as a bucket list item either.

Boxing gloves (Photo credit: Wikipedia)

So, how have the last 2 months panned out…? Day 1 of boxing boot camp may as well have been an army fitness test as far as I was concerned – and I have NO interest in joining the army so that should give you some insight into how I felt about that morning. But then the actual boxing started and I LOVED it, and I mean genuinely, not just because of the endorphins. It was a great workout and an amazing tension release twice a week. I did develop a real life ‘injury’ (not gonna lie, was a little proud of that – you don’t get injuries from sitting on the couch!), which hampered my ability to do some things, but we pushed through.

Alas, disaster struck with a week to go, I developed a chest infection and with the wedding I was a bridesmaid in only being a week out, boot camp had to go so that I could rest up and make it down the aisle! And I did (although a little bruised – it was always going to happen, thank the lord for spray tans!!) I was actually devastated that I missed the final week, but sometimes these things happen.

Boot camp done, I started to look at the next task to tackle, perhaps circuit classes, a different boot camp, personal training, and then my PT suggested ‘Gravity’ classes… So aside from the fact that they almost died, Apollo 13 was one of my favourite movies as a kid – I kinda wanted to go into space myself so of course I hear gravity and think this is definitely some kind of Astronaut training – WRONG… GUTTED! Gravity actually involves some sort of fancy pants resistance contraption (official terminology) but after a few weeks utilising said machines I think its design objective was definitely a personal trainer’s torture chamber… just saying. I allowed him to talk me into trying this rather than continuing with my beloved (although kinda gross inside) boxing gloves and am mixing it up with some PT sessions and about to start Yoga.

In a nutshell, I wouldn’t say our relationship is made out of the stuff fairy tales are based on, but it’s not all bad, I’m hoping that with time I’ll grow to love him… I mean he really is a decent guy at the end of the day and probably much better for me than that tattoo’d bad boy who comes with binge drinking, a smoking habit and gives me terrible bags under my eyes. Yep, I’m going to stick it out with Endorphins, I think one day we could be very happy together!

Related articles

• My search for endorphins (lifeaccordingtonat.wordpress.com)

What is ‘reality’ television creating?

In a recent interview in Parade Magazine about her movie ‘The Hunger Games’ Jennifer Lawrence spoke about Kim Kardashian’s divorce and how such a situation would be a painful event for anyone. She went on to say:

“But they’re using it for entertainment, and we’re watching it. The books hold up a terrible kind of mirror: This is what our society could be like if we became desensitized to trauma and to each other’s pain.”

I read another article in the paper on the weekend about how kids no longer want to be things like astronauts or superheros (ok, superhero’s might not necessarily be real, but at least it was a noble idea from an infant!) but they do want to be famous celebrities. It is said that this is due to the rise in the number of ‘reality’ tv shows gracing our screens. Now this isn’t all bad… There is also a rise in the number of kids who would like to grow up to be chefs which can be attributed to MasterChef – so at least we’ll be well fed in years to come!

But it can lead to some greater concerns and is probably why Jennifer Lawrence’s comment caught me a little off guard. The celebrity is everywhere these days, and not the good kind. There are the elite athletes, actors, authors etc who are famous for what they actually do, it is their profession, they get paid. And then there is the growing number of famous for being famous people. It started with ‘The Real World’, then came ‘Big Brother’, we’ve had ‘Jersey Shore’, ‘Geordie Shore’, ‘The real housewives of’ EVERYWHERE and the list goes on and on. Oh, how can I forget the most famous family in America – the Kardashians and their franchise of television shows. Now this is all mindless entertainment, and I think we’d be lying if we didn’t all admit to having watched it at some point… I’m telling you, you are lying, even my Dad asked for an explanation of the Jenner/Kardashian family tree!! And for adults it’s fine, we can choose to turn it off or be sucked in to these guilty pleasures and accept them for what they are. The concern comes for the children viewers.

I look at the behaviour depicted on some of these programs and just cringe. These are grownups behaving like… well, frankly, Neanderthals! They are drunk and obnoxious and putting it all out there for the world to see… literally! So if we mix that, with the fact that kids are spending more time in front of computer games where they can rein act wars, throw grenades, ‘shoot the bad guys heads off’ is there any wonder there is mounting concern that our fame hungry juniors will one day be desensitised to the pain of the world.

I vote we go back to the 80’s (metaphorically… my hair wouldn’t cope with a perm) where Roger Ramjet was our hero and if we were super well behaved we got to watch the Disney Movie on Sunday night. Or if that’s too far back lets go to the 90’s… I wanted to be a journalist just like Lois Lane, you know just because working at a newspaper looked cool… oh and ‘Duck Hunt’ was possibly the most violent video game I knew how to play!

Do I have to be a feminist, or can I just be a woman?

Is that not the most ridiculous title… and yet, I am hearing so much debate about this very topic at the moment. The saddest part, it’s primarily between women!

In the past few weeks we’ve heard Germaine Greer have a go at the PM’s bum (I mean REALLY!) which caused uproar amongst feminists; Jacquie O came out saying she didn’t want to be called a feminist which caused some to criticize her and others to ask why she needed to be labelled something at all; and Samantha (Bloody!) Brick caused controversy after penning an article about women hating her because she was beautiful (Just quietly Samantha Darling, they hate you because you are narcissistic enough to write the article, it has nothing to do with your looks!).

By definition, feminism means ‘The advocacy of women’s rights on the grounds of political, social, and economic equality to men.’ (Not, we all hate men and are therefore lesbians like I think a lot of men might believe!) But at the end of the day in western society, we have won the battle on these primary pillars that feminism was based on. Significant feminist voices such as Germaine Greer have changed the goal posts slightly, their ideas were based on women’s liberation as opposed to equality to men – they were fighting for a woman’s right to choice, to embrace the differences between men and women, the ability to define our own values and goals and it not just be about ‘doing what men do’.

All of the banter and arguing about that dirty little word – feminism, and what women think of each other has really got me thinking. And of course men are left saying ‘here they go again’ – how can we really expect them to think any differently when we are still pulling each other down. So what does this mean to me you ask? Well you didn’t, but here’s your hot tip of the day – I’m going to tell you anyway! I believe in a lot of the principles of feminism; however I don’t think I need to be labelled something to do so. I also believe that women need to start putting each other up on pedestals and promoting each other, not tearing each other down while men just sit back and roll their eyes. I quite often feel like I can’t share personal successes with girlfriends – like the don’t care or they just don’t want to hear it, and I think that is sad. Why aren’t we all out there shouting “You go girl” and encouraging each other to succeed.

I recently became a member of a great organisation for women called ‘Business Chicks’ a national community of business women in Australia – a whole group dedicated to promoting and helping each other succeed. On the forum there was a great article last week entitled ‘Are you a Rapunzel or a ladder kicker?’ where it talked about  the fact that we have achieved that gender equality in the workplace that feminists of days past fought so hard for, and yet now we are kicking each other down.  I wish I had had women who had let down their hair and taken me under their wing, but I certainly hope that I will do that for other talented women in the future. Why do we continually forget that another woman’s success does not detract from our own? Rather than being envious or insecure about it, we should be learning from each other and even, god forbid, asking for help or advice.

I personally look to a few women out there that I truly admire and have had the sort of success that I aspire to. They run their own companies, they are published, they are respected in their fields, they have families AND from what I can tell they are Rapunzel’s and not ladder kickers! To me women like Mia Freedman currently of mamamia.com.au, Roxy Jacenko of Sweaty Betty PR, Lisa Wilkinson currently on channel 9, and many, many more, embody these aspirations I have of the sort of woman I would like to be known as.

So whilst saying the PM’s dress sense often made her bum look big, was perhaps not Germaine’s finest hour, maybe one of Julia’s girlfriends should have pulled her aside and just quietly said ‘hey darl, let’s lose the boxy jackets’ rather than sending her out to the wolves, or maybe we could have focussed on the 1minute 20 sound bite of Germaine talking another woman up that came before the silly bum comment! Either way, whether you consider yourself a feminist or not maybe think about whether you are a Rapunzel and that doesn’t just apply to the business world – because that is when I truly believe feminism has won, when we have established equality amongst ourselves.

“I call myself a feminist. Isn’t that what you call someone who fights for women’s rights? We all come from the same mother. That creates the basis for compassion.” – The Dalai Lama

Things are a little different to the wedding day when we were 4…

As little girls we play games, we dress up, we act out how we believe being a grown up should be. To a 4 year old, grown up life goes as follows: you pull a pair of mum’s old high heals and what is likely to be a nighty out of a dress up box, grab the boy from next door, get married (but don’t kiss, because that is GROSS!!), a baby appears (you don’t even realise how awkward it is that your new baby is an asian doll but your new husband has blonde hair an blue eyes!), he goes off to work and you sweep the cubby house and have cups of tea with Mr Ted…

How AMAZING does grown up life seem, and it is SO unfair that it is an eternity before you’ll get there.

Fast forward 20-25 years and things seem just a little bit different! A long with the fabulous shoes (now your own) and the kissing of boys (no longer gross) and of course the freedom to roam beyond the back fence without supervision, also comes bills and responsibilities and rules and jobs and suddenly playing dress up and having cups of invisible tea seems so long ago.

I recently attended my high school 10 year reunion (call me Doogie Howser, because I swear I’m only 22)… leading up to it there was much conversation amongst my girlfriends about the mixed emotions that were felt towards the occasion. I for one was quite excited to see people, find out where people were and what they were doing, others were filled with anxiety about being asked those very questions. I think the biggest contributor to the feelings of trepidation was that just like at 4, at 18 we all had an image in our head of where we would be 10 years into the future and quite often the reality is very different. I think the fear of others judging us often comes from the fact that we are not necessarily where WE thought we’d be, but we fail to acknowledge the journey that has been taken in the mean time!

So the reunion was a little daunting and it was a significant mile stone that reminded us we were growing up, but something even bigger is about to occur… My oldest friend (as in we’ve known each other since the age of 3, not that she is 97) is about to become the first of my close girlfriends to get married!! For me it is such a surreal feeling, maybe it’s because part of me still thinks of us as those little 4 year olds – I was a bridesmaid at her first wedding where we flipped a coin for the groom and a lacy dressing gown of my mothers was the wedding dress, or the 17 year olds talking about the dream lives we’d be leading in 10 years time as we syphoned alcohol and snuck out over the back fence.

Here is someone I have shared every significant event I can remember with and she is now getting married, and for real this time, which makes us actual GROWN UPS!! It makes me chuckle, we own cars, pay rent & bills, cook dinner, have careers and responsibilities and yet this is the thing that has made me realise we are getting older, our lives are changing and new chapters are beginning. I am so excited to stand up there with her this weekend as she begins the next part of her journey, even if it is slightly different to how we’d imagined it would be!

There are a few key differences to the first wedding – I am VERY glad that I won’t be marrying the groom the next day because I lost the coin toss (I love him dearly, just not like THAT!), also glad that we won’t be sharing wedding dresses, and very much hope that an asian baby doesn’t follow this wedding because now that would be well beyond awkward! Although,  I must admit… I’m a little sad we won’t be having a tea party with the teddy bears afterwards!

I wish you nothing but joy my darling, I can’t believe it’s nearly wedding day!!!!

love,

Nat x

This week I reflect on my courageous inspirations…

2 days ago I jumped in the car on a day that seemed to start like any other… Seconds from pulling out of my drive way though I heard the news of Jim Stynes passing as Kate Langbroek read a statement from his wife on the radio. Moments later, I was pulled over on the side of the road with tears streaming rather uncontrollably down my face. Jim Stynes was definitely a legend of our community, he was a gentleman of the football field, a hero to the ailing MFC and a pillar in our community, helping those less fortunate and raising awareness for their plight. He is an inspiration and I hope his legacy lives on.

However, I didn’t know Jim Stynes personally, so whilst I felt like it was a tragic loss, I couldn’t quite work out why it had me in such a fragile state. I sent a text to one of my brothers to see if he had heard the news and to inform him I was sitting on the side of the road in tears and I couldn’t work out why. He was at work, and also a little emotional which was not ideal in the workplace and we established that this particular piece of news had probably hit a little too close to home for us.

Jim Stynes was a relatively young man, he was an athlete, he was a father and husband, he was someone who gave to his community. Now, she may not have played AFL football, but we have an aunt who was fit and athletic, is a wife and mother, gives to the community and is in her mid 40’s and she too is battling this ugly disease. In fact, our aunt and grandmother (her mother) are both courageously fighting and inspiring us every step of the way.

When my beloved aunt Deb was first diagnosed with Ovarian Cancer almost 4 years ago our family was rocked to its core. Like most people we knew very little about this ‘silent killer’ and refused to believe the bleak statistics that were put before us. With the alternative being a complete meltdown I went into research mode, scouring university resources, reading pages upon pages of clinical trial information, looking for anything that would make sense. All through those terrible initial weeks I kept having this one thought that was very odd, but also made me feel like such a terrible person… 95% of the time I was angry and confused and couldn’t work out why this had happened to someone so fit and healthy and young… the other 5% thought if this was going to happen to one of us Deb was the one who would be brave enough and strong enough to beat the Cancer into submission…

And then remission came…

And then… 2 years after initial diagnosis and just weeks before Deb and my uncle were due to fly out for an anniversary trip to Italy that had been postponed due to Cancer mark 1, I got a call from Deb one Friday afternoon saying she had something to tell me. When I put the phone down my brother, seeing the look on my face, asked what had happened. As I finished telling him the Cancer battle had not yet been won, his response was “I have something to tell you”… I will never forget that instant, nauseating, heart pumping in your ears feeling I got when he spoke those words. He had been sworn to secrecy until Mum had time to see me (If you’ve ever watched ‘Brothers & Sisters’, picture the Walker family and you will understand who we are!) but our Nonna (grandmother) had also just been diagnosed with Ovarian Cancer and was going in for surgery. How was this even possible? It wasn’t fair, it wasn’t right, these are good people… these are people I love and adore and can’t live my life without… yep, I had a tantrum… what else was there to do. And then I picked myself up and moved in to help look after my cousin whilst Deb had treatment, because that’s what we have to do – keep going.

Last January I flew to Sydney with my aunt and grandmother (at that stage both back in remission) as my mum lay in hospital recovering from a preventative hysterectomy, for a photo shoot with Women’s Day and to film a segment for “Morning’s with KAK”… We were a feature of 3 generations touched by Ovarian Cancer in a ‘Teal’ special for awareness month. As long as I live (and now the tears are back!!) I will never forget that day and how unbelievably brave and inspirational these two women in my life are. Deb has become a tireless beacon in the plight to raise awareness, and my amazing grandmother who is not at all confident in her English speaking ability spoke on camera about something so terrifying with such bravado. Each woman has used the other (and their families) as a reason to keep fighting, and whilst it is not something any mother/daughter duo should have to go through together, I believe having someone so close who truly understands how it feels has helped them both along.

Both of these tremendous women are no longer in remission… back on the ‘cancer merry-go-round’ as we call it and we have no idea what the future holds. My heart rate sky rockets and tears spring instantly to my eyes when I think about the milestones in my life that I might not get to share with 2 of my most inspiring and my most cherished people, but in the mean time we take every day as it comes. As a family we have had our fair share of ups and downs, but at the end of the day there is a tremendous amount of love and that is what counts. We have learnt to laugh about the tough stuff, a favourite that has now spread even beyond our family is ‘dory brain’ a name I lovingly gave Deb during her first round of chemo when she was forgetting everything (a la Dory from ‘Finding Nemo’), we appreciate the little things, we take that overseas trip NOW rather than putting it off til next year and most recently have started taking insurance out on things like theatre and concert tickets because you just never know what is going to happen!! And possibly most importantly, we raise awareness… we talk about this insidious disease, we talk about body awareness, do interviews, write blog posts, attend and spread the word about fun runs and fundraising events… you name it, we’ll do it in the hope that one day others won’t have to live the same fight.

My sincere thoughts and prayers go out to not only the family and friends of Jim Stynes but to everyone else who has lost a loved one this way… it is the most frustrating, hopeless feeling to love someone who is suffering, but if they depart us knowing you loved them, I believe you have done everything you could and all they would have asked for.

Love, Nat

xx

**The images in this post are from the article featured in the ‘Teal Ribbon Issue’ of Australia’s ‘Woman’s Day’ in Feb 2011

*** for more information on Ovarian Cancer please head to http://www.ovariancancer.net.au

Related articles

• Vale Jim Stynes. A towering figure and a great, great man (thepunch.com.au)

Letter to Baby Boomers

Image via Wikipedia

Dear Baby Boomers,

Please let me finish before you say anything (how many times did you hear us say this as kids before delivering you a well rehearsed [all be it rather flawed on refelction] sales pitch?!)

I want to preface this letter with 2 key points…
1. Us Gen Y’s are actually much fonder of you Baby Boomers and Gen X’s than you are of us… some of my favourite people on earth are part of your lot… so keep that in mind when reading this letter!
2. We don’t always appreciate it, but totally understand your judgement of us. We can’t stand the current youth brat pack that is the Gen Z’s or naughties or whatever the ferals that have come after us are called these days.

Ok, so here is the thing, if I hear “Young kids today…” one more time (until the day it starts to come out my mouth of course), well I won’t actually do anything because you have always told us we need to respect our elders, but I’ll be seething on the inside (politely of course!).

My life isn’t a failure or over because I’d rather trek through South America than buy a house in Sactuary-Vale-Links-Lakes Estate or whatever the newest fringe suburb of Melbourne 435km from the CBD is (although incidentally, there is absolutely nothing wrong with my fellow gen y’s who think South America is ridiculous and want a roof over their heads, we have OPTIONS and are all different which is what makes us so special – but we’ll get to the things you’ve told us as we grow up in a moment!)
I’m also not going to die unhappy or alone becuase at 27 I’m not married with 2 of the 3 toddlers and a golden retriever you wanted for me running around my ankles in the above mentioned estate. In fact, forget the rugrats, I’m not even married, but that is ok too. I’m not going to settle just yet on the off chance I run into Bradley Cooper and the above mentioned picture turns out a little more how I had envisaged it! 

We know we haven’t had the same career path since we were 17 and finished high school (because that is SUCH a great age to be making big life decisions isn’t it?!), but isn’t the purpose of life to find something we love doing, or at least the thing that pays for the prettiest, most expensive shoes? Oh and the drinks in South America.

And finally, on the job front, we’re not all a bunch of lazy so and so’s floating through life without any direction… A lot of the people I know work ridiculous hours and carry around a tiny piece of technology that means even when they are away from work, it is still with them wherever they go… how many of you were receiving work related telegrams at the pub on a Saturday night hey!?

Now, I’m not about to play the blame game… As I said, we love you, I just wanted to highlight a few things that you taught us along the way…
1. We are all so, so special, can do anything, have anything, and be anything… Yup, your words, every night as you tucked us in. Along with the world is our oyster, you have your whole life ahead of you etc etc
2. You gave us the best life you could with everything you had, and whilst we may not always show it, we do appreciate it (well most of us, most of the time). So of course we’re going to strive for more, better, NOW!
3. Yes, we do want instant gratification,  we see something decide we want it and have to have it now… BUT, you guys gave us credit cards and the Internet and On demand TV!! Really? What did you expect!?
4. I know this is a touch subject, so lets just lightly touch the surface and then move on… we don’t rush into marriage and babies at 22 because we don’t want to be divorced by 40… let us explore, we’ll figure it out! And I guess tying into that as well as out penchant for multiple jobs or what you might see as a nomadic/gypsy lifestyle – “don’t settle”, “find happiness”, “You only get on shot at this life”… Your parents were perhaps a little more practical in their teachings (oh and a depression and war probably played a part in that one) but you taught us to dream big – and we do!!

So in conclusion, THANK YOU!! All the things you pick apart about us are just the parts of your teachings we have embraced. We may be a little impulsive, a bit silly, I believe frivolous and irresponsible are occasionally bandied about, but we’ll make it in the end, after all it is OUR lives we’re playing with! Plus some geezers before us started destroying the planet and invented nuclear warfare so what would be the point of having money in the bank if something happened with either of those things!!

Finally, at least we’re not slightly overweight 10 year olds who spend all day sitting in front of a screen, ask for new laptops instead of bicycles for our birthdays and aren’t at all interested in listening to anything you have to say… I’m sure that letter will follow in 15-20 years!

Your ever loving and lovable Gen Yer,
Nat
xx

My search for endorphins

the endorphins (Photo credit: Moonez)

Another ‘feature’ of 2012 was that I was determined to discover what ‘endorphins’ are… Mostly I just wanted to see if Elle Woods was correct in saying  “Exercise gives you endorphins. Endorphins make you happy. Happy people just don’t shoot their husbands, they just don’t.” – Legally Blonde

I am also one of those people who doesn’t really do things by halves, and I tend to find something new and become rather obsessed – need to know everything about it, have everything to do with it and that all needs to happen NOW (I know, therapists exist for a reason!). So that is how I find myself booked in to a 6 week boxing boot camp and 2 circuit training classes a week. Oh and did I mention this requires an alarm to go off at 5am… 4 mornings a week?! It is also half an hour away from my home and requires me to pack a bag and go to my parents house to shower and prepare for the day so that I can make it to work on time (this morning I forgot shoes…!!) Dedication to the cause?

I think I should probably point out at this time that I am not one of those really fit people who claims they can’t do anything and then RUN’s a marathon (well maybe not that extreme, I hear those things are pretty hard!) just for kicks… I am genuinely unfit – I recently had to purchase a pair of runners at the start line to a WALK for charity because I forgot them… clearly not a priority!

So this morning my alarm went off for the first time at 5am and I jumped up (ok that’s a lie, I spent 15 minutes checking what had happened in the twitterverse in the previous 6 hours and then I jumped right up) and laced up my new runners and checked that I had packed everything I needed (see I told you I hate wearing shoes – I keep forgetting them!) and totally misjudged how long it would take me to cross town and then found myself atop an exercise bike before the sun had even said good morning.

Image via Wikipedia

I will be completely honest… I was ready to give up within 15 minutes. Well I had decided I would save face and at least stick the session out but that group activity clearly wasn’t for me and I was clearly far too far behind these people to be in this class… and then a miracle happened… I’m positive it was the endorphins!!! I actually enjoyed it!! Probably more so on reflection than when I was actually trying to lift 2 weights above my head whilst holding my core muscles and keeping my feet off the ground, but enjoyed it never the less! I put it down to the amazing fitness coach Tony at Studio Forty6 Personal Training, who really made me feel welcome and included and made sure I knew how to do each activity without pushing me beyond my beginners means. The reassurance that whilst today might totally suck, in as little as 3 weeks I will notice a big difference was definitely an added boost!

I finished the class and had shaky legs and couldn’t really lift my arms, but otherwise felt fantastic!! It really was a great way to start the morning but I was adamant it was all due to my new found friends the endorphins but that I would be cactus by lunch time and definitely asleep by 5pm (awkward when you have a full time job)! BUT… I am still alive and still awake!! The stairs and I aren’t getting along too well and I am sure I will be SUPER sore tomorrow, but I am looking forward to a very good sleep tonight and am actually excited about the next class – lets just hope the boxing coach is as gentle on me the first time round!

The moral of this story, is actually not a sales pitch on the studio (although they ARE amazing!!) but that I’m picking my battles. I wanted to make a lot of changes this year but I am also aware that self motivation when it comes to the gym is definitely not something I possess! Sometimes it really pays to bite the bullet and spend the additional money to seek out the help of the professionals – pay them to motivate you, because if you are anything like me if you try and do it by yourself the only thing that you will be punching when that 5am alarm goes off is the snooze button!

I’ll get back to you in a few weeks and let you know how I’m getting along with my new endorphin friends, maybe I’ll be one of those happy people who actually does run a marathon just for kicks (ok, that is clearly the endorphins talking) 😉

Nat
xx

Why are ‘grown ups’ so obsessed with our love lives (or lack thereof)!!

Image via Wikipedia

We have a running gag in my family when it comes to family dinners. We would sit down and before a mother/aunt could open their mouths one of us kids would shout out “L.L, go!!” and point at someone who would have to take the spotlight. ‘L.L’ stands for Love Life, and apparently it is the most important thing worth asking us ‘kids’ about!!

I had a friend whose parents were convinced she was a lesbian because she never brought any boys home for dinner. In reality, it would have been a parade of men traipsing through the family home, none staying for too long, and I’m not sure her mother would have been too happy about that either! (incidentally, I believe she is now engaged… to a man… her Mum doesn’t like him).

Relationships are hard work, and please don’t get me wrong, I am a huge fan of them, but I don’t think they should define a person nor should it be the most important question you have to ask someone. If I had a dollar for every time I heard:
* “I just don’t understand why you girls are single”
* “Why don’t you have a boyfriend?”
” You are getting older you know, when I was your age I had alread… blah blah blah”!
I would have enough money to… well I don’t know where that statement can go, bit it would definitely be something fabulous!

Everyone has that friend who gets a new boyfriend/girlfriend and completely shuts themselves off from everything else in their lives. I think the juggling act is probably the hardest part of relationships – we want to have our partners and our jobs and friends and hobbies and time to ourselves – how does it all fit together?! (p.s if you can successfully answer that question send me an email, or a marriage proposal 😉 )

I recently was having a conversation with my grandfather about 3 overseas trips I had planned with friends in the next 12 months (now before you go thinking that may sound a little excessive – lets put things into perspective and remember that I don’t have a house or kids or any of those other things I’m apparently supposed to be spending my hard earned cashola on!) His first question to me after I’d excitedly described our plans was – “But what if you find a boyfriend during that time?” I wasn’t quite sure what the correct response to this was, as I was a little lost for words. I don’t know whether I was more shocked that his initial reaction was about my relationship status and not the places I was visiting (although his 2nd question was “How will I ever buy a house if I keep going overseas?” So I don’t know why I was so surprised!). Or that if I miraculously met a man, all my other plans automatically had to go out the window…

I guess the positive is that if Prince Charming did come and sweep me off my feet in the next 12 months and subsequently cancel all the plans I had for my future, at least I’d have something to say at the next family dinner when a brother shouted out “L.L” and pointed at me…!

Nat
xx

The 2012 resolution

I was fortunate to have the first of what I hope is many ‘Ah-Ha’ moments recently (for those not familiar with the term, the proverbial light bulb went on). The thing about these moments of clarity is that it doesn’t matter how many the people around you are fortunate to have, its not one of those learn from others type scenarios – nothing will resonate until you get it yourself!

What was my moment of clarity? I have shoes on my feet!!! No, really. I found myself stuck in a trap that I believe is actually quite common. This is what I believed: Sad and unpleasant things had happened and more sad and unpleasant things will happen through the course of the rest of my life. I’m getting to the shoes, I promise. For the first time, I thought this: yes, at the ripe old age of 26 it’s likely I haven’t already been dealt my life time supply of crappy things, however, that is not going to be what MY life is about. To paraphrase the genius that is Dr. Seuss – I have brains in my head, and my feet in my shoes, I can steer myself in any direction I chose.

Now for someone who has always had an aversion to wearing shoes (literally and metaphorically I suppose!) this was a HUGE moment for me. My life could be amazing if I decided that is what it was going to be. Now I know what you might be thinking… and no, I haven’t taken drugs or fallen and hit my head, I know it’s not going to be a bed of roses (although, I’ve never really understood that expression because roses have thorns.. sorry, I digress) but the bumps can be just that, bumps in the road, not the whole road.

So that’s really how 2012 started, and where this chapter of the journey begins.

I promised myself that 2012 would be amazing, no matter what happened. There would be holidays, friends, new adventures and most importantly, I would learn to just enjoy the little things. So part of my story will be the little things that put a smile on my face these days… So let me quickly bring you up to speed with 2012 so far and the things I am loving:

1. Nothing is better than summer afternoons in the sun with fabulous friends!!

2. My first trip to Bunnings – attempting to grow herbs and salads – if nothing else playing in the dirt was fun (as was the awesome sausage sizzle out the front – Saturday lunch WIN!)

3. Cooking yummy new meals to share with friends… this is a new fave – seared tuna nicoise pasta

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4. Beautiful, supportive girlfriends who ran for a cause so close to my heart at dawn on a Sunday morning. Here the girls completed the ‘Queen of the Lake’ event in support of Ovarian Cancer

5. Cooking comfort food… because running in the morning justifies eating this!!

6. Doing business in Sydney & running towards this in the morning as my inspiration – greatest way to start a day

4.  5. 6.

7. Discovering new local treasures – the Taco Truck parked in East Brunswick!!

8. Spending time with my favourite people, nothing beats having fabulous friends

9. And finally, possibly the best thing to happen to me ever… Shellac… where have you been all my life!!!!!

7. 8. 9. 

So that is how 2012 has started, I’m pretty excited to see what comes next!

xx

Nat

Hello world!

As someone who has a lot to say, this was obviously the next logical step…! Now as soon as I figure out how to best go about sharing my thoughts on all things, from the point of view of a 20something girl in the city, we’ll start talking 🙂